24. I'm well rested

Diana took William into the night with Aida. Virginia, whom I rejoice in her merit, took William into the night and morning. I slept till a delicious 8:30am. I kissed him goodbye, as he was trying to drain Diana's fullness, and went to a meditation day. I got home and got to see him for a little while before D, V and W went to Jacky's shower, for her little girl that is on the way. I too a long delicious nap. I woke up 5 hours later, and then Diana came home with William. He looked so big and precious. I held him for a while, Diana gave the last feed, and then she went to bed. I rocked him to sleep. He's grunting, so I don't think he's fully cooked, but who knows. I've got the multicultural lullaby CD that Celeste, Steve and Katie gave us, playing. But I'm not that tired. I'm well rested and my mind is fairly well washed from the meditation. Thus begins another week.

Notes from the weekend: Michael calls William "Flock of seagulls" because his hair is kind of like the lead singer in Flock of seagulls sometimes, wooshed down to a point in front and flared up in the back.

I love the aunts and others holding and doting on William. Virginia, Aida, Paquita and others. He's been rich in attention thus far in his life. Everyone comments on him not crying that much, I think because we try very hard for it to not get to that point. They say the less he cries in the first year, that sets a pattern, he expects to get his needs me, so he does not panic so much. It engenders a kind of confidence. A secure base, as Bowlby calls it. Meanwhile, society outside the family does not so much support children. When I'm on the streets with him, I feel a weird vibe.

These are salad days, he's pretty quiet and fairly easy to take care of, and he's pretty helpless. He can't move around too much. I feel really lucky that I just ended school, and it's time to look for a job, so I can take this little break to get to know him. My grandfather Parks says he was not so much around when his children were born, being in the military and all, and that's a shame. I can't imagine how Grandmother coped by herself. I hope she had friends and family around her. I have a newfound respect for parents.

Diana is talking about an intense month taking 2 classes, so she can finish her masters and get that monkey off her back, in July. Classes in the daytime 4 days a week. Maybe I can string this gig out for another month. My friend Joe already has a job at an outpatient mental health clinic, I am very happy for him, and a little jealous. I've been doing therapy for the past few years, and now I'm not so much. I find myself digging into Diana, others, I need to get back to work, keep my skills sharp, begin in my career. And yet this is such sweet time. William is so wonderful. My little Jyoti. They say that's a women's name in India, but in Buddhist circles, it's for both.