Diana was talking about getting William art lessons, and Andres music lessons, and William said, "I want Spiderman lessons." He's wearing his Spiderman costume from Halloween all the time. I remember liking Spiderman and the Hulk when I was little. I bought comics of them when I was younger.
Here's a Spiderman photo on facebook.
Andres says, "I told you so," when you pester him to do something and he does it. I wonder if I gave him the know-it-all jean.
We're having a lovely Christmas. I hope everyone is well.
Thursday, December 25, 2008
Friday, December 19, 2008
Saturday, December 13, 2008
Loss and illness
Tim is in the hospital and we're hoping he's OK.
Patrick Kavanagh passed away.
Punya passed away, he's a Buddhist friend. I can't find an on-line obit.
Patrick Kavanagh passed away.
Punya passed away, he's a Buddhist friend. I can't find an on-line obit.
Newnan part two
We had a nice dinner at Sprayberry’s Tuesday night and then Molly and Ben came over. The boys really took to Molly, it was quite sweet to see her enter into their play and listen to them. The boys were their usual energetic and alive levels, with their egotistical pursuits where they worked to include others. I must say I think William is a wonderful social being. Andres is a little more withdrawn, and perhaps watches his older brother, but also joins in and plays wonderfully. I do wish they would take turns in conversation better, but that will come with time, I’m sure. I see streaks of know-it-all, and interrupting that are uncomfortable mirrors, and just plain difficult behaviors at times. Just before they came over I was upset at William for punching me in the eye during some rough housing. Turns out he’d just punched his mother in the eye too, which really annoyed me. I can get so angry one minute, and feel their sweetness the next, which is what children are like. Anyway, I’m a big fan of Molly now after he sweetness to the boys. Molly said a funny story about Braxton. He looked at the Target flier and said, “I want all the toys for boys and some of the toys for girls.”
Wednesday was rainy, and I rested up for the trip back. The boys played well. We left 7am the next day and arrived at 2am in the early morning the next day. Nineteen hours of travel. I was sad to leave them. Thank you to Grandma and Grandpa for their generosity in hosting us while we were there. Thank you to everyone who visited.
Wednesday was rainy, and I rested up for the trip back. The boys played well. We left 7am the next day and arrived at 2am in the early morning the next day. Nineteen hours of travel. I was sad to leave them. Thank you to Grandma and Grandpa for their generosity in hosting us while we were there. Thank you to everyone who visited.
Tuesday, December 09, 2008
Newnan
We drove to Annapolis Saturday evening, which took 5 hours from NYC. Gas prices have dropped and are cheaper outside the city—I was happy to learn that. The boys watched a lot of movies, and Andres took a nap. We stopped for dinner in Deleware. We got to Gretchen’s around 10. The boys were scared of Georgia the bulldog, and Kalamazoo the cat, but they got to playing with them eventually. I played with the cat, and they copied that.
In the morning they were more into playing with them, they enjoy the tug-of-war with Georgia, who out weighs them. We went to breakfast at a really good place. Gretchen lives in an interesting part of Annapolis, so it was cool walking around there. We thought we might come back another time seeing how cool it is.
The drive from Annapolis to Newnan was grueling, but the boys did really well. They had me stop for an emergency pit stop quite a lot, but there were no accidents. We let them run around at rest stops and when we got gas. Andres took 2 naps. We left around 11am and got there around 11pm. We’ll be doing that on Thursday again, when we reverse course.
We’ve just been hanging out here. The boys have been gentle with Grandma. I went food shopping with Grandpa. The boys draw, play with lego or trains. The boys like running around the house. Braxton came over yesterday, and they played for a while. Braxton is really cute. William was really excited to see him. Braxton liked playing with the puzzle, and the trains. He also liked running around with the boys.
They’re out raking leaves with great grandpa. I found a wifi spot to do some internet. They have 3 networks in range of my grandparents but I don’t know the passwords. I thought to knock on doors, offer them some money. But decided to find another spot. The library is close, so that's where I am.
In the morning they were more into playing with them, they enjoy the tug-of-war with Georgia, who out weighs them. We went to breakfast at a really good place. Gretchen lives in an interesting part of Annapolis, so it was cool walking around there. We thought we might come back another time seeing how cool it is.
The drive from Annapolis to Newnan was grueling, but the boys did really well. They had me stop for an emergency pit stop quite a lot, but there were no accidents. We let them run around at rest stops and when we got gas. Andres took 2 naps. We left around 11am and got there around 11pm. We’ll be doing that on Thursday again, when we reverse course.
We’ve just been hanging out here. The boys have been gentle with Grandma. I went food shopping with Grandpa. The boys draw, play with lego or trains. The boys like running around the house. Braxton came over yesterday, and they played for a while. Braxton is really cute. William was really excited to see him. Braxton liked playing with the puzzle, and the trains. He also liked running around with the boys.
They’re out raking leaves with great grandpa. I found a wifi spot to do some internet. They have 3 networks in range of my grandparents but I don’t know the passwords. I thought to knock on doors, offer them some money. But decided to find another spot. The library is close, so that's where I am.
Tuesday, December 02, 2008
New cell phone
I got a new cell phone, so I'll be taking more pictures again, that go easily to Facebook. Here's the latest photo.
Here's one of Andres.
Here's one of Andres.
Monday, December 01, 2008
Sunday, November 30, 2008
Chicago
We had a lovely trip to Chicago.
Our flight there was not too stressful. I think I'm getting more used to traveling with my pollywogs. Here's a link to Andres on plane.
Here's a link to a photo of William on the plane.
Andres was next to me, and he fell asleep and I got to finish my Paul Auster book, Brooklyn Follies.
We had a lovely Thanksgiving meal when we arrived. The boys liked the apartment my parents are renting near the Navy Pier. They had some presents, a big collection of markers and paper, plus scissors and glue. William and Andres made some pictures for them.
Friday we went to the Field Museum. Above is a photo of William in front of the famous Sue. Then Kathy and Rich treated the boys to some presents in the Sue Store. I got to look at the little Tibetan section.
We had a lovely lunch at Wishbone. Then we hung out at home, after the boys tried a nearby park. Rich and Kathy were amazed at the animation and sophistication of children's movies like The Incredibles, and Ratatouille. The boys played together nicely for the most part.
Saturday we went to the Lincoln Park Zoo.
William would not say goodbye to Glamma when we got to the airport. He wanted to change the reality by denying it was happening. In the airport we saw a large reproduction of a dinosaur, and the boys got some more gifts. Poor William dropped his winter globe of Sue, and broke it. So I bought him another one. Our flight back was OK. We were in the last row. Andres fell asleep just as we were about to land. Victor was right there with our car. I think it was a lovely trip. Thank you Kathy and Rich for such a wonderful time!
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
homework
Andres calls a TV magazine his "homework" and likes to write in it and cut it.
We spent lunch with William's class yesterday. I love making connections with other parents. There's wonderful mixes in the class. One child has a Japanese father and Peruvian mother. Another is half Chinese. Another is half Panamanian. So many interesting mixes. My boys are half Ecuadorian! What a wonderful mix!
We spent lunch with William's class yesterday. I love making connections with other parents. There's wonderful mixes in the class. One child has a Japanese father and Peruvian mother. Another is half Chinese. Another is half Panamanian. So many interesting mixes. My boys are half Ecuadorian! What a wonderful mix!
Monday, November 24, 2008
Update
Thank you to Abuela for cooking and Diana for cleaning for our 20 people early Thanksgiving party. Thanks to everyone who came. We had a lovely time with family early because we're out of town on Thanksgiving.
William got 3 shots and blood taken. Andres has blood taken. They went to the doctor and when Diana got home she said, "you owe me one." The boys had some presents. They were crying a lot with the shots.
A new nickname for Andres is "Gomez" from The Addams Family. You can check out some of his kissing here. Diana called Andres that because he kisses a lot.
They fixed the concrete sidewalks around our house lately.
William got 3 shots and blood taken. Andres has blood taken. They went to the doctor and when Diana got home she said, "you owe me one." The boys had some presents. They were crying a lot with the shots.
A new nickname for Andres is "Gomez" from The Addams Family. You can check out some of his kissing here. Diana called Andres that because he kisses a lot.
They fixed the concrete sidewalks around our house lately.
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Thursday, November 20, 2008
overparenting?
The New Yorker has an article about overparenting.
Here's a quote: "This used to be known as “spoiling.” Now it is called “overparenting”—or “helicopter parenting” or “hothouse parenting” or “death-grip parenting.”"
It's a book review of A Nation of Wimps: The High Cost of Invasive Parenting.
Here's another quote: "A third development that pushed people into overparenting, Marano and others believe, is the “brain plasticity” research published in the nineteen-nineties. This research said that, while the infant brain is, in part, the product of genes, that endowment is just the clay; after birth, it is “sculpted” by the child’s experience, the amount of stimulation he receives, above all in the first three years of life."
I think I fall for that one a little bit
Here's a quote: "This used to be known as “spoiling.” Now it is called “overparenting”—or “helicopter parenting” or “hothouse parenting” or “death-grip parenting.”"
It's a book review of A Nation of Wimps: The High Cost of Invasive Parenting.
Here's another quote: "A third development that pushed people into overparenting, Marano and others believe, is the “brain plasticity” research published in the nineteen-nineties. This research said that, while the infant brain is, in part, the product of genes, that endowment is just the clay; after birth, it is “sculpted” by the child’s experience, the amount of stimulation he receives, above all in the first three years of life."
I think I fall for that one a little bit
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
transitinoal objects
Reading Winnicott, and thinking about transition objects, the thing that comes to mind for William was that he would always carry a Thomas train. It was frustrating because we would be at the park and he would need use of his hands to climb a ladder, but he would refuse to give up the train in his hand. He needed the comfort of a train in his hand. The park must have been threatening, he needed the comfort, never mind if it didn't make sense to climb a ladder with a train in his hand. He wanted near the pleasure of his train.
Andres carries the latest present we gave him, he likes to be thought of, though he's not so specific about what he wants. He's wanted cars and taxi cars, and other things. Recently it was a motorcycle we bought the day of Ashton's christening. He carried that around a lot.
In Play and Reality he suggests that if you don't wean the child by 4 months, it will be harder, but we didn't have any trouble at weening the boys at 8 months because we used a bottle with formula and breast milk when Diana pumped, when she was tired.
The boys don't have a blanket or teddy bear they have consistently stuck with, though they have favored toys, cars, trains, things they could hold in their hands that represented our love for them in a tangible gift, and the comfort of playing and fun.
The have suffered through the vicissitudes of our work. Diana working and not me, then both of us, then not Diana and then both of us not working. But they seem pretty OK at the moment. They fight and whatnot, get on each other's nerves, try to hurt each other for past wounds. But for the most part I feel they are healthy and wholesome boys, which many good traits and strengths.
I'll end this post with an old web page with William as a baby when I graduated from NYU.
Andres carries the latest present we gave him, he likes to be thought of, though he's not so specific about what he wants. He's wanted cars and taxi cars, and other things. Recently it was a motorcycle we bought the day of Ashton's christening. He carried that around a lot.
In Play and Reality he suggests that if you don't wean the child by 4 months, it will be harder, but we didn't have any trouble at weening the boys at 8 months because we used a bottle with formula and breast milk when Diana pumped, when she was tired.
The boys don't have a blanket or teddy bear they have consistently stuck with, though they have favored toys, cars, trains, things they could hold in their hands that represented our love for them in a tangible gift, and the comfort of playing and fun.
The have suffered through the vicissitudes of our work. Diana working and not me, then both of us, then not Diana and then both of us not working. But they seem pretty OK at the moment. They fight and whatnot, get on each other's nerves, try to hurt each other for past wounds. But for the most part I feel they are healthy and wholesome boys, which many good traits and strengths.
I'll end this post with an old web page with William as a baby when I graduated from NYU.
Friday, November 14, 2008
wizard of oz
We watched The Wizard of Oz with the boys. It's odd to see classics as an adult, watching as a parent. This movie is really emblazoned on my consciousness, I know the songs. I forgot how camp it is. The boys like it, repeat the line, "I'll get you my pretty!" Those flying monkeys are really creepy. Andres was afraid of the cowardly lion. Diana reminded me of the lines one of our students used to keep saying.
4.5
William is 4 and a half today. Whoop! He woke up and began drawing. He's awesome. I love him. And his wonderful brother. Last night they were playing so much, Diana left the room for a while before they fell asleep. William was counseling his brother to stay int he room.
Monday, November 10, 2008
day with William's class
I spent the day with William's class. It was awesome. While the setting is overwhelming, kids running around, lots of areas to play in. There is structure and guided play. I was asked a lot, "do you have any questions?" I didn't really have any, but it was nice to discuss things with the various staff. I'm really happy with the school and staff, and his teacher. An amazing day. Poor Andres was so jealous. I thought everyone in William's class was really cute.
I've now seen Andres' class and William's class. Now it's back to Andres' class for the next Parent Participation Program visit. I hope to get at least one more in for each of them, maybe 2. These are golden years. Such good adorable boys.
I've now seen Andres' class and William's class. Now it's back to Andres' class for the next Parent Participation Program visit. I hope to get at least one more in for each of them, maybe 2. These are golden years. Such good adorable boys.
Saturday, November 08, 2008
Friday, November 07, 2008
Skype
Glamma and Grandpa Rich got to see Andres and William on the computer screen with Skype yesterday. I think it's amazing this technology, it's such a wonderful thing to connect grandparents and grandchildren visually.
Thursday, November 06, 2008
Andres has strept throat
We went 2 weeks ago, and they said he didn't have anything, but they said we should come back in 2 weeks for a follow up. And they found it this time. He can't go to school tomorrow, which isn't good because it's pizza day and show and tell for him. Seems OK, though, I think we caught it early.
Sunday, November 02, 2008
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
Halloween
The boys are into dressing up, William got his spiderman costume on Monday and he's been wearing it a lot.
Here's a post on good Halloween poems.
Photo posts coming soon.
Here's a post on good Halloween poems.
Photo posts coming soon.
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Andres
Potty training update: Andres had no accidents two days ago, and only one, in a rage, yesterday. He's pooping in the potty, the second task, and his diaper isn't full in the morning so he's holding it during the night--though we're not going no diaper overnight yet. He's doing great. I'm impressed and proud of him. The first day he had so many accidents, and we were at times running out of underwear, but we persevered, and he's done a good job.
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
3 times
With the teacher, we decided Tuesday was the day we would try no pullups for Andres. He would wear underwear. So he went in his underwear, pants and socks 3 times before we could get out of the house this morning. The third time he had his shoes on, and the urine goes down to his shoes, so he needs a new pair of shoes. Yikes. Needless to say, they were late getting off to school.
Sunday, October 12, 2008
photos
Andres
William was writing letters. Glamma made him practice writing, and he did well. He was proud of his work.
in the surf
We had a lovely visit from Glamma Kathy and Grandpa Rich. We went to Rockaway Beach. Here's William in the surf.
Saturday, October 11, 2008
family excitement
"I'm so excited that Grandma and Grandpa are coming that I love everyone in the whole wide world," said William
Andres chants in the background, "whole wide world, whole wide world!"
Andres chants in the background, "whole wide world, whole wide world!"
Thursday, October 09, 2008
Facebook photo
Here's a link to a photo I sent to Facebook.
The other day he was "riding the roller coaster" by going down the slide locked in with other boys. They had a terrific time, except William hurt himself three times, and by the third one that was finally enough. So we had to go home. And Andres wasn't happy about that, so he cried, and they both arrived home weepy.
The other day he was "riding the roller coaster" by going down the slide locked in with other boys. They had a terrific time, except William hurt himself three times, and by the third one that was finally enough. So we had to go home. And Andres wasn't happy about that, so he cried, and they both arrived home weepy.
Wednesday, October 08, 2008
Andres' class
I spent 8:45-12:00 with Andres' class. I enjoyed seeing his peers, seeing his teachers, seeing the routines. They're so cute, those little kids. Andres' teacher says he's a model student. He said he thinks Andres is ready to loose the pull-ups, have some accidents and wear underwear.
stop, drop and roll
Andres said, "stop, drop and roll," quietly. I asked him if he learned that at school when there's a fire and smoke. He said yes. He said his teacher taught it to him. Because of the attention he said it over and over again. He said it so much that it annoyed William, who at one point said, "I'm not going to stop, I'm not going to drop and I'm not going to roll!"
Saturday, October 04, 2008
music
Robert Johnson, Bill Evans, Babel Gilberto, Alison Krauss and Tom Petty are the 5 CDs in our CD player at the moment.
Friday, October 03, 2008
Friday update
Andres earned some more cars by using the toilet. He won't go to the bathroom, but he likes to earn stars towards cars, so we're using a behavior modification to help motivate him to do something we want him to do. William gets stars for cleaning up and misses getting presents for going to the bathroom.
Sometimes Andres insists of getting whatever William has. It's been pointed out that Andres often wants the very thing that someone just picks up. He has his own interests though. Andres has gotten into cards, even though he doesn't really know how to play games. William is playing with trains. They fight occasionally. Sometimes they resolve it on their own, sometimes an intervention is needed. Andres sometimes whines instead of just asking for help, we're trying to change that behavior too.
They called me today from the school, William puked in the class. Maybe he ate too much or bread got stuck in his throat. I took them to the park where 3 classmates of William and another kid from the school play. William likes the swing. But they play a game where they run from him, and he doesn't like that, so we went home earlier than we usually do.
Diana was out shopping with her mother. Abuela got them winter jackets. Diana is going out with the women tonight, it's girls night out.
Sometimes Andres insists of getting whatever William has. It's been pointed out that Andres often wants the very thing that someone just picks up. He has his own interests though. Andres has gotten into cards, even though he doesn't really know how to play games. William is playing with trains. They fight occasionally. Sometimes they resolve it on their own, sometimes an intervention is needed. Andres sometimes whines instead of just asking for help, we're trying to change that behavior too.
They called me today from the school, William puked in the class. Maybe he ate too much or bread got stuck in his throat. I took them to the park where 3 classmates of William and another kid from the school play. William likes the swing. But they play a game where they run from him, and he doesn't like that, so we went home earlier than we usually do.
Diana was out shopping with her mother. Abuela got them winter jackets. Diana is going out with the women tonight, it's girls night out.
Wednesday, October 01, 2008
Sunday, September 28, 2008
Thank You
Thank you to Virginia, Tim and Sebastian for their kindness in hosting Andres' big birthday bash at that place. So many pitched in and worked hard, so many people came and everyone had a wonderful time. We're all so proud of how wonderful Andres is. Hooray for Andres!
Friday, September 26, 2008
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
Three
Andres turned 3 yesterday. I'll upload some old videos of him as a baby when I can get around to it. We watched a bunch of old videos of him to celebrate his upcoming birthday. When he woke up we gave him Abuela's presents. She got him some new Diego shoes, and some clothes. She got him balloons for his party at school. Andres likes Diego. He had a party at school with cup cakes. We got to hang out with his class and teachers. Another kid was going to have surgery so he celebrated his birthday on the same day. Poor kid kept asking his mother for a hug. Perhaps he sensed her anxiety about his surgery. William came up to the class to join us and was a bit of a wild boy and Abuela came too. William has a male teacher who seems calm and competent aware assistants who were calm too. One of William's classmates had a birthday too. We'll have to arrange a play date with him, the father asked for one. After school we went to the park and played for a while. Some of their classmates were there. One of Andres' classmates was there, but he didn't play with him, despite my prodding him to. Diana talks to a woman with two little children, who seems overwhelmed. We came home and opened Andres' presents and then played with them. I had to go to class, but later that night a bunch of people came over for more birthday party for William, with Grandpa, Aida, Natasia and her friend's children that we hang out with, plus Tia Alba. I hope he had a good day. We got a card from Great Grandpa & Grandma Parks, and Grandpa Zane and Bridget (that sang out when you opened it).
Sunday, September 21, 2008
I want to be first
The many cartoons and TV shows for children are a huge abundance of wisdom. They seem to know what the children are going through. William was first infected with the idea that he wanted to be "first".
William got this from school, but he's been working through this for a year. Of course his brother has caught this, and he's maybe started on it earlier, and he's caught in it now at the moment. Andrew was crying when he came home yesterday from the movies. He wanted to be first, but he wasn't.
They saw Igor. Diana and Aida said the main theme wasn't one kids could get. They said 10 year old Natasia didn't get it. It was more for adults. The theme was that people aren't bad, that they've had trauma and that is what makes them bad.
So, I've seen on a show the theme, "you can't always be first," theme, and the new Thomas The Tank Engine has that issue at the beginning.
William is nice, when his brother screams because he wants to be first, usually William obliges his brother, but sometimes he doesn't and that is problematic for Andrew. I hope he's getting the "optimal frustration" Kohut speaks of.
William got this from school, but he's been working through this for a year. Of course his brother has caught this, and he's maybe started on it earlier, and he's caught in it now at the moment. Andrew was crying when he came home yesterday from the movies. He wanted to be first, but he wasn't.
They saw Igor. Diana and Aida said the main theme wasn't one kids could get. They said 10 year old Natasia didn't get it. It was more for adults. The theme was that people aren't bad, that they've had trauma and that is what makes them bad.
So, I've seen on a show the theme, "you can't always be first," theme, and the new Thomas The Tank Engine has that issue at the beginning.
William is nice, when his brother screams because he wants to be first, usually William obliges his brother, but sometimes he doesn't and that is problematic for Andrew. I hope he's getting the "optimal frustration" Kohut speaks of.
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
"I want Grandma Kathy"
24 days to Grandma Kathy and Grandpa Rich's visit. William cried when I traced out the number of days on the calender. He says he wants trains--he still remembers which ones he doesn't have and plays with Thomas The Tank Engine trains. Unfortunately with me being between jobs we can't go out and just get him one to soothe him. He says he wants scary books, and not scary books. William is angry at me for delivering the news that Grandma Kathy isn't coming.
I think William is struggling because we're focusing on Andres in potty training. We need to operationalize some desired behaviors so we can have an excuse for rewarding him. I think that's what this is all about. I have been smooth in the transition. There are things we're working on.
I enjoy watching the boys run at the park. I like pushing William on the swing. I love it when people say that William is good with people. Andres is having trouble sharing at times, which hinders the ease of getting along with others at the park. Our maxim is "if you bring it to the park, you have to share it." Andres didn't like sharing his chalk, even though there is plenty. Andres is better at playing catch, William hasn't gotten into that, though he does like to toss the ball sometimes.
I have lots of photos on Facebook of our trips to the park.
Yesterday they somehow took 4 roofs off the jungle gym.
William had a good day yesterday following directions, his teacher said so. We were so proud of him. Andrew is separating well. Good stuff!
I think William is struggling because we're focusing on Andres in potty training. We need to operationalize some desired behaviors so we can have an excuse for rewarding him. I think that's what this is all about. I have been smooth in the transition. There are things we're working on.
I enjoy watching the boys run at the park. I like pushing William on the swing. I love it when people say that William is good with people. Andres is having trouble sharing at times, which hinders the ease of getting along with others at the park. Our maxim is "if you bring it to the park, you have to share it." Andres didn't like sharing his chalk, even though there is plenty. Andres is better at playing catch, William hasn't gotten into that, though he does like to toss the ball sometimes.
I have lots of photos on Facebook of our trips to the park.
Yesterday they somehow took 4 roofs off the jungle gym.
William had a good day yesterday following directions, his teacher said so. We were so proud of him. Andrew is separating well. Good stuff!
Monday, September 15, 2008
found camera timer to take photos
William is being a T-Rex, which explains his face. He likes to be a T-Rex. Often people don't get it that he's acting, which is a shame. T-Rex isn't exactly what you want in socializing. Anger and aggression is OK in the T-Rex, so we accept it, but unfortunately the rest of the world doesn't so much.
feeding children
Go here for an excellent article on feeding children.
Here's a quote: "Fussiness about food is a normal part of a child’s development. Young children are naturally neophobic — they have a distrust of the new. Even the most determined parents can be cowed by a child’s resolve to eat nothing rather than try something new. As a result, parents often give in, deciding that a bowl of Cocoa Puffs or a Pop-Tart, while not ideal, must be better than no food at all."
Here's a quote: "Fussiness about food is a normal part of a child’s development. Young children are naturally neophobic — they have a distrust of the new. Even the most determined parents can be cowed by a child’s resolve to eat nothing rather than try something new. As a result, parents often give in, deciding that a bowl of Cocoa Puffs or a Pop-Tart, while not ideal, must be better than no food at all."
Sunday, September 14, 2008
Paul's wedding album of friend's photos
Go here. They have been touched up by Bill, so they're all excellent photos.
Saturday, September 13, 2008
Tuesday, September 09, 2008
day 5
Diana stayed home, I walked them, and Andres insisted we drop off William first. But then he went into the class without crying. He seemed upset, but he kept it together. So he's adjusted, on the level of not crying. He's happy at the end of the day, all 4 days so far.
Saturday, September 06, 2008
Friday, September 05, 2008
3rd day
Andes still has trouble separating. Friday is pizza day, so we don't have to pack lunches. Rather, Diana doesn't have to, I can't lie about my packing lunches thus far this week, because I have focused on other things, like toileting.
I think being a single parent would be really hard, but one thing would be that the communication and collaboration wouldn't take up much time, there's just one vision. When it comes to getting to boys of to school smoothly, I have done it, before Andres came along, with just William. Two boys complicate things.
Diana had to run up to Union Turnpike to get Natasia this morning, because she threw up. We were supposed to not baby sit Ashton any more, Diana gave two weeks notice, but somehow we are. I think Diana's connection to her family is nice. Limit setting is a weakness of my own. Ashton is a sweet baby.
Anyway, I get easily overwhelmed by parenting, and was glad when I was walking out with the boys plus Ashton, that Diana came along with Natasia.
Andres was more weepy this morning, perhaps because she went out and didn't walk with us. He asked to be carried, which I did for little bits, but not as much as he wanted. He wanted to drop William off before he went in. Then he wanted me to stay. He couldn't take a picture, he wanted to cling. So we had to have a difficult goodbye with force to pry him off me, and keep him with the assistant teacher.
I tried to get them to bed last night so they would be well rested, missed the end of the Giants game (they won). Diana has been putting the boys to bed, but I put them to bed last night. Except after William fell asleep Andres asked for his mommy and she came in after Aida and Natasia left. I read to them, and sang to them. I know William has had enough sleep when he wakes up at 7am on his own. Andres slept till 7:40, and we try to leave for school at 8:15, getting there by 8:30. Diana ironed their clothes, picked them out. Because it's the first week of school, I'm letting William watch a dinosaur show before he goes.
You may have noticed I'm around for this. I'm between jobs, which is a blessing this week, though I hope to get a job soon. The boys like me being around, and I like being around them, even if sometimes I get overwhelmed and need some private time. Setting limits isn't always easy for me, and I go from being hyper responsible to abdicating responsibility easily. I have difficulty with this middle ground, being the powerful helper I aspire to.
There may be some increased blogging during this time.
I think being a single parent would be really hard, but one thing would be that the communication and collaboration wouldn't take up much time, there's just one vision. When it comes to getting to boys of to school smoothly, I have done it, before Andres came along, with just William. Two boys complicate things.
Diana had to run up to Union Turnpike to get Natasia this morning, because she threw up. We were supposed to not baby sit Ashton any more, Diana gave two weeks notice, but somehow we are. I think Diana's connection to her family is nice. Limit setting is a weakness of my own. Ashton is a sweet baby.
Anyway, I get easily overwhelmed by parenting, and was glad when I was walking out with the boys plus Ashton, that Diana came along with Natasia.
Andres was more weepy this morning, perhaps because she went out and didn't walk with us. He asked to be carried, which I did for little bits, but not as much as he wanted. He wanted to drop William off before he went in. Then he wanted me to stay. He couldn't take a picture, he wanted to cling. So we had to have a difficult goodbye with force to pry him off me, and keep him with the assistant teacher.
I tried to get them to bed last night so they would be well rested, missed the end of the Giants game (they won). Diana has been putting the boys to bed, but I put them to bed last night. Except after William fell asleep Andres asked for his mommy and she came in after Aida and Natasia left. I read to them, and sang to them. I know William has had enough sleep when he wakes up at 7am on his own. Andres slept till 7:40, and we try to leave for school at 8:15, getting there by 8:30. Diana ironed their clothes, picked them out. Because it's the first week of school, I'm letting William watch a dinosaur show before he goes.
You may have noticed I'm around for this. I'm between jobs, which is a blessing this week, though I hope to get a job soon. The boys like me being around, and I like being around them, even if sometimes I get overwhelmed and need some private time. Setting limits isn't always easy for me, and I go from being hyper responsible to abdicating responsibility easily. I have difficulty with this middle ground, being the powerful helper I aspire to.
There may be some increased blogging during this time.
Thursday, September 04, 2008
2nd day
Andres had to be pried away from his mother, and we left under protest by him. William was excited to go to school. I liked his attitude when he said, "today is going to be a good day." Andres is excited too, but still adjusting. His teacher said he was quiet yesterday. William's teacher says he cries when he doesn't get his way, then bosted, "he will get over that because I don't give in to crying." Looks like an interesting battle of the wills. I don't think we give in to his crying, but I do like to support people emotionally. And sometimes that clarifies things, and we go ahead with something new.
Wednesday, September 03, 2008
1st day of school
We just dropped Andres and William off at school.
William is old hat, but he's got a new teacher, and some of his classmates from the previous class are in his class. His room is huge and he's excited about a train table. His teacher is a disciplinarian, which hopefully will be good for William.
We introduced Andres to his classroom, and then brought him along to say goodbye to William, and then brought him back. I watched several goodbye scenes. All but one kid cried when the parents left. Andres went into the pack with Mommy, and then he said she could leave. I was summoned. I read to him a little bit.
I was the last parent, so there was pressure to make me leave. So I made the decision when he wasn't paying attention to the book I was reading. They seemed like good people, the staff. I know Andres is going to do well in school. One mother kept telling her son not to feel the way he clearly felt. There's a kid who'll need psychotherapy at some point. He'll wonder why he is ashamed of his feelings, wonder why he often doesn't know what he's feeling.
Diana was was so sad. I think her feelings are essential, that's her passion for the boys, no need to apologize. She's sad to see her babies go to school. Now they are pre-K kids, no longer babies and infants. It's that very sadness and overwhelming feelings that make her such a good mother. Feelings pass. She will be a great mother of school age kids.
I feel excited. I know Andres will do well. William is already adjusted to school they are going to be so excited to tell me what happened today. Andres will tell me the naughty behaviors of other kids, who accidentally bumped into him, what the teacher said when someone was in trouble. William will tell me about the train table, and what Lola and Brianna did. Those girls are wild. Cool stuff, I can't wait.
Pictures to follow.
William is old hat, but he's got a new teacher, and some of his classmates from the previous class are in his class. His room is huge and he's excited about a train table. His teacher is a disciplinarian, which hopefully will be good for William.
We introduced Andres to his classroom, and then brought him along to say goodbye to William, and then brought him back. I watched several goodbye scenes. All but one kid cried when the parents left. Andres went into the pack with Mommy, and then he said she could leave. I was summoned. I read to him a little bit.
I was the last parent, so there was pressure to make me leave. So I made the decision when he wasn't paying attention to the book I was reading. They seemed like good people, the staff. I know Andres is going to do well in school. One mother kept telling her son not to feel the way he clearly felt. There's a kid who'll need psychotherapy at some point. He'll wonder why he is ashamed of his feelings, wonder why he often doesn't know what he's feeling.
Diana was was so sad. I think her feelings are essential, that's her passion for the boys, no need to apologize. She's sad to see her babies go to school. Now they are pre-K kids, no longer babies and infants. It's that very sadness and overwhelming feelings that make her such a good mother. Feelings pass. She will be a great mother of school age kids.
I feel excited. I know Andres will do well. William is already adjusted to school they are going to be so excited to tell me what happened today. Andres will tell me the naughty behaviors of other kids, who accidentally bumped into him, what the teacher said when someone was in trouble. William will tell me about the train table, and what Lola and Brianna did. Those girls are wild. Cool stuff, I can't wait.
Pictures to follow.
Tuesday, September 02, 2008
Sunday, August 31, 2008
Canada
We flew up Friday to Buffalo, rented a car, and came to the Canadian side. Our room has a lovely view of the falls. We got a little lost, and I was cranky, but we didn't get as lost as others.
Yesterday we went to Paul and Nadia's wedding in lovely Niagra-on-the-lake, a quaint and lovely little town. After the beautiful wedding we had a few hours before the reception, and we walked around it. The reception was lovely. We didn't stay for the whole thing, but I don't think it went on much longer. I'm not going to plug all the places and create links because this is a blog about the boys, not link for link sake. William broke two glasses, but someone told me to lighten up, they're an Italian family who likes children, so I tried to. I'm aware of how tense and pressured I am, hoping the boys will be more obedient, less rowdy. Not the way it is. The trick is to stay in the game without numbing down and tuning out.
The boys are obsessed with their godfathers. Paul being William and Ray being Andrew's. Ray doesn't come over as much (he's a Yankees fan, and I invite Paul over for Mets games and as busy as he is, he often comes). So to make up for it, I told Andrew that he has a shadow godfather, because when John first came to NYC, they called him "Boston Ray". He was perhaps the next Catholic on my list to ask to be Godfather if Ray decline. Ray and John are good friends. So anyway, I call John the shadow godfather, to make Andrew feel better, and they liked that. It was cool to see Bill and Paul as well, plus Billy, Mark and Mat. I met other friends I'd only heard about. Paul is such a good guy and has lots of close friends.
So today we went on the maid of the mist. We went to the IMAX theater to see a dinosaur movie, but they only show it at 1pm; Wish we would have known that. But the boys found some dinosaurs they liked in the gift shop, so they perked up. Right now they're running back and forth in the room, and whacking me underneath the table.
I think my favorite moment of the trip so far, was when Andrew saw Diana in her dress for the wedding, he said, "mommy you're a princess."
After seeing everyone, another favorite moment was when I was reading Naked by David Sedaris. I was reading his essay Naked, and I was just laughing out loud for the first two pages. I had to read it to Diana. There's nothing so precious as a belly laugh. My friend Tony just read his last book and really enjoyed it.
So here's Sedaris on Letterman, reading a short essay.
Sedaris by the way has nothing to do with Canada, that I know of.
Photos to follow when we get home. I took about a million.
here's another video I found:
Yesterday we went to Paul and Nadia's wedding in lovely Niagra-on-the-lake, a quaint and lovely little town. After the beautiful wedding we had a few hours before the reception, and we walked around it. The reception was lovely. We didn't stay for the whole thing, but I don't think it went on much longer. I'm not going to plug all the places and create links because this is a blog about the boys, not link for link sake. William broke two glasses, but someone told me to lighten up, they're an Italian family who likes children, so I tried to. I'm aware of how tense and pressured I am, hoping the boys will be more obedient, less rowdy. Not the way it is. The trick is to stay in the game without numbing down and tuning out.
The boys are obsessed with their godfathers. Paul being William and Ray being Andrew's. Ray doesn't come over as much (he's a Yankees fan, and I invite Paul over for Mets games and as busy as he is, he often comes). So to make up for it, I told Andrew that he has a shadow godfather, because when John first came to NYC, they called him "Boston Ray". He was perhaps the next Catholic on my list to ask to be Godfather if Ray decline. Ray and John are good friends. So anyway, I call John the shadow godfather, to make Andrew feel better, and they liked that. It was cool to see Bill and Paul as well, plus Billy, Mark and Mat. I met other friends I'd only heard about. Paul is such a good guy and has lots of close friends.
So today we went on the maid of the mist. We went to the IMAX theater to see a dinosaur movie, but they only show it at 1pm; Wish we would have known that. But the boys found some dinosaurs they liked in the gift shop, so they perked up. Right now they're running back and forth in the room, and whacking me underneath the table.
I think my favorite moment of the trip so far, was when Andrew saw Diana in her dress for the wedding, he said, "mommy you're a princess."
After seeing everyone, another favorite moment was when I was reading Naked by David Sedaris. I was reading his essay Naked, and I was just laughing out loud for the first two pages. I had to read it to Diana. There's nothing so precious as a belly laugh. My friend Tony just read his last book and really enjoyed it.
So here's Sedaris on Letterman, reading a short essay.
Sedaris by the way has nothing to do with Canada, that I know of.
Photos to follow when we get home. I took about a million.
here's another video I found:
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
End of summer
Sunday, August 17, 2008
Shadow godfather
My boys have 2 godfathers, Paul and Ray. If Ray would have said no, I might have had to ask John, who stars in this video with a lovely lady.
Monday, August 11, 2008
facebook link
Does this link work? It's public photos from my cell phone that I sent to Facebook.
So I think it works, so here's another one.
Thing one and thing two asleep.
So I'm just picking out the best from my mobile uploads on facebook. You can't see my double chin on this one.
This one is one of my first on my cell phone, you can see how young Andres looks, I don't think he'd had a hair cut yet.
They're in a good mood getting back from Florida, sharing a pop.
Here's another early one of Andres.
Andrew's first hair cut.
I call Andres, "Andrew" because that's the name I wanted. Here Andres/Andrew has ice creme on his face.
Sunglasses William.
Perhaps my favorite. William fell asleep in the shopping cart, while Andrew looks on.
Mother's Day 2007
Track suit boys.
I love William's smile.
Cute kids.
One of Andrew.
So I think it works, so here's another one.
Thing one and thing two asleep.
So I'm just picking out the best from my mobile uploads on facebook. You can't see my double chin on this one.
This one is one of my first on my cell phone, you can see how young Andres looks, I don't think he'd had a hair cut yet.
They're in a good mood getting back from Florida, sharing a pop.
Here's another early one of Andres.
Andrew's first hair cut.
I call Andres, "Andrew" because that's the name I wanted. Here Andres/Andrew has ice creme on his face.
Sunglasses William.
Perhaps my favorite. William fell asleep in the shopping cart, while Andrew looks on.
Mother's Day 2007
Track suit boys.
I love William's smile.
Cute kids.
One of Andrew.
Sunday, August 10, 2008
tats
Andrew came in and said, "I saw two tats." Diana pointed out earlier to me that he puts a T with the C.
We had tickets to the Mets game, through family, but the Andrew said he was scared, and then William didn't want to go when I wouldn't take a whole backpack of toys. So I went with Jose and had a good time, even though the Mets lost. It's the last season at Shea, and perhaps it's just hype about the history of baseball, but I like going to Shea in it's last year. We took the boys last year, but they haven't been this year, the last year.
William had scratches on his face, Christian scratched him, trying to get a bat from him, at Nati's 11th birthday party on the weekend, for the larger family.
We just watched The Pursuit of Happyness, an intense movie. The boys are back from Aida's. Diana is sick, so Aida took care of the boys for a while, when I went to the Mets game.
We had tickets to the Mets game, through family, but the Andrew said he was scared, and then William didn't want to go when I wouldn't take a whole backpack of toys. So I went with Jose and had a good time, even though the Mets lost. It's the last season at Shea, and perhaps it's just hype about the history of baseball, but I like going to Shea in it's last year. We took the boys last year, but they haven't been this year, the last year.
William had scratches on his face, Christian scratched him, trying to get a bat from him, at Nati's 11th birthday party on the weekend, for the larger family.
We just watched The Pursuit of Happyness, an intense movie. The boys are back from Aida's. Diana is sick, so Aida took care of the boys for a while, when I went to the Mets game.
Sunday, August 03, 2008
spider pig
The boys saw the Simpsons Movie and Andrew likes to be held up high and walk on the ceiling. They call walking on the ceiling "spider pig".
William said to Diana yesterday, "You're so normalize." That's derived from Spongebob Squarepants, who says, "that's so normal," sometimes.
We went to visit Erin Grace Kelly, the newborn daughter of Bill and Jessica, Diana's cousin. She has a step brother Joseph, from Jessica. Josephy was a baby when I met Diana. Jessica came from Ecuador to have Joseph in America. He's going to be 15 the 19th of August. Bill is Woodside Irish, thus the non-Hispanic name.
There was a lot of debate about the name. Grace Kelly would be a notorious name. So they put it in the middle.
Erin is a wee little lass, with dark hair and the newborn leg twist that is suggestive of being inside another human being, scrunched up.
Jessica seems to be doing well, though she's occasionally weepy as she readjusts her hormones back to not carrying a living being inside her, just hormones for one normal adult female.
Today is our 11th anniversary, and Grandpa Zane's birthday. Aida is going to watch the boys so we can spend some time together without others. When she wakes up. She's become addicted to Battlestar Gallactica, and stayed up late watching it, and slept over.
I feel so wanged out from the responsibilities, overwhelmed. I just got Diana a birthday present. I got Natasia finally a graduation present. Natasia's birthday is next week. Diana and I keep asking each other what we want to do. It's hard to come up with some high activity idea. It seems to be what people want from us. But I think we're just going to spend some quiet time at home. I really just want to talk with Diana uninterrupted. It's so hard to have a conversation with the kids and everyone around. I look forward to spending time with her.
William said to Diana yesterday, "You're so normalize." That's derived from Spongebob Squarepants, who says, "that's so normal," sometimes.
We went to visit Erin Grace Kelly, the newborn daughter of Bill and Jessica, Diana's cousin. She has a step brother Joseph, from Jessica. Josephy was a baby when I met Diana. Jessica came from Ecuador to have Joseph in America. He's going to be 15 the 19th of August. Bill is Woodside Irish, thus the non-Hispanic name.
There was a lot of debate about the name. Grace Kelly would be a notorious name. So they put it in the middle.
Erin is a wee little lass, with dark hair and the newborn leg twist that is suggestive of being inside another human being, scrunched up.
Jessica seems to be doing well, though she's occasionally weepy as she readjusts her hormones back to not carrying a living being inside her, just hormones for one normal adult female.
Today is our 11th anniversary, and Grandpa Zane's birthday. Aida is going to watch the boys so we can spend some time together without others. When she wakes up. She's become addicted to Battlestar Gallactica, and stayed up late watching it, and slept over.
I feel so wanged out from the responsibilities, overwhelmed. I just got Diana a birthday present. I got Natasia finally a graduation present. Natasia's birthday is next week. Diana and I keep asking each other what we want to do. It's hard to come up with some high activity idea. It seems to be what people want from us. But I think we're just going to spend some quiet time at home. I really just want to talk with Diana uninterrupted. It's so hard to have a conversation with the kids and everyone around. I look forward to spending time with her.
Saturday, August 02, 2008
Disappeared photos
People have requested photos not be made public of their children, so photos have been removed from the blog. On the one hand, I must respect the wishes of parents. On the other, I think it's silly because I just put first names, and it's not like it's searchable in a web search, nobody would know who the people are. Birth announcements are another thing. Well, I'll celebrate the extended family in text. I really should have gotten permission to put photos of people. I suppose this is such an obscure blog that it's not really public, but really it is possibly. So I've learned I need to ask to put a photo on the blog, which I did have a haunting suspicion about and feel embarrassed.
in case text becomes unavailable
Parks' service in WWII and Korea propelled him into the pulpit
Date July 19, 2008
By ALEX McRAE
At the height of the Great Depression, Ralph Parks was happy to find work. But when his pay started coming in promises instead of cash, he knew he had to make a change.
Instead of hunting a new job, Parks joined the Navy.
He never dreamed his decision would land him in the middle of two major wars and propel him to a life in the pulpit. But through it all, Parks never doubted his decisions were the right ones.
"I realized later the Lord's hand is on everything," he says. "And I think it all turned out pretty well."
Parks was born in 1922 in Sugar Grove, Va. When he was 5, his dad gave up farming and took a job in the coal fields near Beckley, W. Va. Parks helped tend the family garden, and when he was lucky, made 50 cents a day hoeing corn for local farmers.
His mother and father were active in the local Methodist church, but in the small, rural community, services were only offered once a month. When he was "8 or 9" Parks gave his life to Christ at a revival.
"I vividly remember asking God to forgive me and wondering how He could do that," Parks says. "I didn't think I was worth it."
Parks' church involvement deepened with each passing year, but he learned that being a church member didn't always mean living an upstanding life.
After high school, Parks didn't want to work the coal fields. The Sunday school superintendent at Parks' church had a small farm and offered him a job for $15 dollars a month plus room and board. For the first few months, things were fine. Then the man quit paying Parks, promising to do better but never coming through with the cash.
Parks finally left and never collected his past due pay.
"He was head of the Sunday school, but he certainly wasn't filled with the Christian spirit," Parks says. "It was a big disappointment."
Other jobs were still scarce. So Parks joined the Navy in July 1940.
He went to Norfolk, Va., for basic training and machinist mate school. In March 1941, Parks headed for the Miami Naval Air Station as an aircraft mechanic. Just months later, America went to war and the Miami situation grew considerably less laid back.
"We all thought we could be under attack any day," Parks says. "You didn't know what was happening and had to plan for the worst."
While in Miami, Parks resurrected an old dream. Soon after high school, Parks paid $5 to a traveling pilot for a plane ride and had always wanted to fly again. In Miami, he started taking private flight lessons and earned a pilot's license.
"I felt like it was really a step forward," Parks says. "I was really proud."
While Parks was getting his private license he was also getting Navy flight time in the back seat of torpedo bombers. A few times, Parks was allowed to fly the plane, sometimes when it was doing simulated torpedo runs just 8 to 10 feet above the ocean.
"The more I flew the more I liked it," he says.
Parks finally applied for Navy flight training. He was accepted and became a cadet in the Navy's Enlisted Aviation Pilot Training program. Parks' training took him to Dallas, Tx., Nachitoches, La., Athens, Ga., Memphis, Tenn., and Pensacola, Fla., where Parks was awarded his wings in June 1945. One month later, he was commissioned as an Ensign.
Parks stayed in Pensacola and flew scouting and observation planes, then headed back to Norfolk for fleet training. By then, he wasn't traveling alone.
In 1942, while still in Miami, Parks met a young lady named Elizabeth Goodson at a roller skating rink. Elizabeth was from Attalla, Ala., but had moved in with her sister in Miami after her mother died.
Ralph was smitten with Elizabeth, but he was already dating two other girls. It made Christmas shopping a nightmare. Parks solved the problem by purchasing three identical heart-shaped lockets for his lady loves. He suspects two of the girls were turned off when their lockets turned green. Elizabeth stuck with him, though, and they were married on Aug. 21, 1942. The date was not a coincidence.
"We got paid on the 5th and 20th of every month," Parks says. "Lots of marriages happened on the 6th and 21st. That's the only time we had any money."
World War II ended before Parks was sent overseas. Not too much later he got a big taste of faraway places when he was assigned to a 13-month goodwill voyage aboard the cruiser USS Helena.
Parks flew to England, boarded the Helena and sailed for parts unknown. Every few days he flew missions in his Curtiss SC-1 scout/observation plane to keep his flight status current. He also got to see some extra sights. All were memorable.
The Helena stopped in Scotland in time to see Edinburgh residents get their first taste of ice cream since the war started. The ship also stopped in Toulon, France, and Naples, Italy, where some postwar resentment clearly lingered. One night as the crew of the Helena watched a movie on the deck, a man felt a sting in his shoulder and realized he had been shot by a sniper on shore.
"That was a tense moment," Parks says. "We were always a little more careful after that."
Parks cruised through the Suez Canal and remembers looking out to see nothing but sand on either side of the ship. He recalls Ceylon, where oxen plowed the fields and women beat their laundry on rocks. In Hong Kong, he stayed aboard a British ship and took his first hot bath in months.
But the highlight of Parks' cruise was Tsing Tao, China. Not because of the spectacular sights, but because in Tsing Tao, Parks learned his first son had been born.
When Parks returned home, Elizabeth was waiting with the 9-month-old baby.
"I was glad to see him, but I was more excited about seeing her," Parks says. "It was a great time."
Parks went back to Pensacola for a three-year stint as a flight instructor. But after 1,000 accident-free flights, he began to get bored.
"I was tired of it," he says. "I needed a change.
He transferred to photo reconnaissance and spent six months learning how to take, develop and print aerial photos. He also got to fly the F8F fighter.
"I loved that plane," he says. "It was the hottest thing I'd ever flown."
The flights were fine, but the landings were tricky. The recon planes were catapulted off the deck to begin a mission, but landed in the water, supported by a large central float and two smaller floats under the wings.
When pilots returned from missions they had to walk out on the plane's wing and attach cables from the ship that hoisted the plane back aboard."
"It got tricky at times, and it could be dangerous," he says. "But that was the job and you learned to do it."
After his training ended, Parks was qualified for aircraft carrier landings and went to the Naval Air Station in Miramar, Ca., to begin work as a combat photo reconnaissance pilot. He also started flying Grumman F9F jets.
In 1951 Parks was assigned to the aircraft carrier Essex and went to fight in Korea as a combat recon pilot on an F9F jet.
The Essex split its time between Yokosuka, Japan, and battle stations off the east coast of Korea. Parks made a total of 100 carrier landings, including 64 photo recon missions. His efforts earned him three Air Medals. Parks says he was only hit by enemy fire once, but it wasn't for lack of effort on the Koreans' part.
On one mission Parks was assigned to photograph a crossroad where top Korean officials were expected to gather for a meeting. Parks usually took photos from 5,000 feet, but this time he had to fly within 1,000 feet of the target to get more accurate pictures.
As he neared the target, Parks was bothered by the noise from the plane's heater and switched it off. As the heater noise died away all he could hear was the sound of guns firing his way.
"As soon as I heard that I turned the heat back on and kept going," he says. "I didn't need to hear that gunfire."
In Korea, Parks' recon plane was sometimes accompanied by a fighter flown by Neil Armstrong, who later became the first man to walk on the moon. Parks and Armstrong went to Japan together three times, and Parks followed his former buddy's career with interest.
"When I saw him walk on the moon I was very proud," Parks says. "He was a good man, and I wasn't surprised he did so well."
While he was overseas, Parks' second son was born. Seven grandchildren and five great grandchildren followed.
After duty in Korea, Parks taught instrument flying in Texas. After a brief stop in California, he was sent to Georgia Tech to get a college education like most of the other pilots he flew with, many of whom were Naval Academy graduates.
While at Georgia Tech, Parks' life began to change. He and Elizabeth were active at First Baptist Church in Avondale Estates, and the more Parks talked to his pastor and fellow church members, the more he felt like he was being called to the ministry.
"I had always studied the Bible and tried to live a good Christian life," he says. "But I felt like I needed to do more."
Parks resigned his Navy commission and finished his Georgia Tech degree, then enrolled at the Southeastern Baptist Theological Seminary in Wake Forest, North Carolina. He was ordained a Baptist minister in February 1960 and accepted a call as pastor of the Bethsaida Baptist Church in Riverdale, Ga.
After stops at two South Carolina churches, Parks earned a Master's of Divinity degree and, in 1973, came to First Baptist Church of Newnan to serve as Assistant Pastor and Minister of Education.
"It was all as fulfilling as I had hoped," he says. "I knew I was doing what I was meant to."
In 1981 Parks was called as pastor of First Baptist Church in Hogansville and stayed until 1988, when he retired. For the first time.
After two years, Parks felt the urge to go back in the ministry. But this time he went back to his Methodist roots. Over the next 12 years he pastored four Methodist churches in the LaGrange District of the North Georgia United Methodist Church Conference. Parks finally retired for good in 2001.
"I had some frightening times in the military, and even after I entered the ministry, some of my church experiences were unpleasant," Parks says. "But I always knew where to turn when I had trouble. Some people wait until the last thing to turn to the Lord, but that's the first place you need to go. I knew that was the place that always furnished the answers."
Date July 19, 2008
By ALEX McRAE
At the height of the Great Depression, Ralph Parks was happy to find work. But when his pay started coming in promises instead of cash, he knew he had to make a change.
Instead of hunting a new job, Parks joined the Navy.
He never dreamed his decision would land him in the middle of two major wars and propel him to a life in the pulpit. But through it all, Parks never doubted his decisions were the right ones.
"I realized later the Lord's hand is on everything," he says. "And I think it all turned out pretty well."
Parks was born in 1922 in Sugar Grove, Va. When he was 5, his dad gave up farming and took a job in the coal fields near Beckley, W. Va. Parks helped tend the family garden, and when he was lucky, made 50 cents a day hoeing corn for local farmers.
His mother and father were active in the local Methodist church, but in the small, rural community, services were only offered once a month. When he was "8 or 9" Parks gave his life to Christ at a revival.
"I vividly remember asking God to forgive me and wondering how He could do that," Parks says. "I didn't think I was worth it."
Parks' church involvement deepened with each passing year, but he learned that being a church member didn't always mean living an upstanding life.
After high school, Parks didn't want to work the coal fields. The Sunday school superintendent at Parks' church had a small farm and offered him a job for $15 dollars a month plus room and board. For the first few months, things were fine. Then the man quit paying Parks, promising to do better but never coming through with the cash.
Parks finally left and never collected his past due pay.
"He was head of the Sunday school, but he certainly wasn't filled with the Christian spirit," Parks says. "It was a big disappointment."
Other jobs were still scarce. So Parks joined the Navy in July 1940.
He went to Norfolk, Va., for basic training and machinist mate school. In March 1941, Parks headed for the Miami Naval Air Station as an aircraft mechanic. Just months later, America went to war and the Miami situation grew considerably less laid back.
"We all thought we could be under attack any day," Parks says. "You didn't know what was happening and had to plan for the worst."
While in Miami, Parks resurrected an old dream. Soon after high school, Parks paid $5 to a traveling pilot for a plane ride and had always wanted to fly again. In Miami, he started taking private flight lessons and earned a pilot's license.
"I felt like it was really a step forward," Parks says. "I was really proud."
While Parks was getting his private license he was also getting Navy flight time in the back seat of torpedo bombers. A few times, Parks was allowed to fly the plane, sometimes when it was doing simulated torpedo runs just 8 to 10 feet above the ocean.
"The more I flew the more I liked it," he says.
Parks finally applied for Navy flight training. He was accepted and became a cadet in the Navy's Enlisted Aviation Pilot Training program. Parks' training took him to Dallas, Tx., Nachitoches, La., Athens, Ga., Memphis, Tenn., and Pensacola, Fla., where Parks was awarded his wings in June 1945. One month later, he was commissioned as an Ensign.
Parks stayed in Pensacola and flew scouting and observation planes, then headed back to Norfolk for fleet training. By then, he wasn't traveling alone.
In 1942, while still in Miami, Parks met a young lady named Elizabeth Goodson at a roller skating rink. Elizabeth was from Attalla, Ala., but had moved in with her sister in Miami after her mother died.
Ralph was smitten with Elizabeth, but he was already dating two other girls. It made Christmas shopping a nightmare. Parks solved the problem by purchasing three identical heart-shaped lockets for his lady loves. He suspects two of the girls were turned off when their lockets turned green. Elizabeth stuck with him, though, and they were married on Aug. 21, 1942. The date was not a coincidence.
"We got paid on the 5th and 20th of every month," Parks says. "Lots of marriages happened on the 6th and 21st. That's the only time we had any money."
World War II ended before Parks was sent overseas. Not too much later he got a big taste of faraway places when he was assigned to a 13-month goodwill voyage aboard the cruiser USS Helena.
Parks flew to England, boarded the Helena and sailed for parts unknown. Every few days he flew missions in his Curtiss SC-1 scout/observation plane to keep his flight status current. He also got to see some extra sights. All were memorable.
The Helena stopped in Scotland in time to see Edinburgh residents get their first taste of ice cream since the war started. The ship also stopped in Toulon, France, and Naples, Italy, where some postwar resentment clearly lingered. One night as the crew of the Helena watched a movie on the deck, a man felt a sting in his shoulder and realized he had been shot by a sniper on shore.
"That was a tense moment," Parks says. "We were always a little more careful after that."
Parks cruised through the Suez Canal and remembers looking out to see nothing but sand on either side of the ship. He recalls Ceylon, where oxen plowed the fields and women beat their laundry on rocks. In Hong Kong, he stayed aboard a British ship and took his first hot bath in months.
But the highlight of Parks' cruise was Tsing Tao, China. Not because of the spectacular sights, but because in Tsing Tao, Parks learned his first son had been born.
When Parks returned home, Elizabeth was waiting with the 9-month-old baby.
"I was glad to see him, but I was more excited about seeing her," Parks says. "It was a great time."
Parks went back to Pensacola for a three-year stint as a flight instructor. But after 1,000 accident-free flights, he began to get bored.
"I was tired of it," he says. "I needed a change.
He transferred to photo reconnaissance and spent six months learning how to take, develop and print aerial photos. He also got to fly the F8F fighter.
"I loved that plane," he says. "It was the hottest thing I'd ever flown."
The flights were fine, but the landings were tricky. The recon planes were catapulted off the deck to begin a mission, but landed in the water, supported by a large central float and two smaller floats under the wings.
When pilots returned from missions they had to walk out on the plane's wing and attach cables from the ship that hoisted the plane back aboard."
"It got tricky at times, and it could be dangerous," he says. "But that was the job and you learned to do it."
After his training ended, Parks was qualified for aircraft carrier landings and went to the Naval Air Station in Miramar, Ca., to begin work as a combat photo reconnaissance pilot. He also started flying Grumman F9F jets.
In 1951 Parks was assigned to the aircraft carrier Essex and went to fight in Korea as a combat recon pilot on an F9F jet.
The Essex split its time between Yokosuka, Japan, and battle stations off the east coast of Korea. Parks made a total of 100 carrier landings, including 64 photo recon missions. His efforts earned him three Air Medals. Parks says he was only hit by enemy fire once, but it wasn't for lack of effort on the Koreans' part.
On one mission Parks was assigned to photograph a crossroad where top Korean officials were expected to gather for a meeting. Parks usually took photos from 5,000 feet, but this time he had to fly within 1,000 feet of the target to get more accurate pictures.
As he neared the target, Parks was bothered by the noise from the plane's heater and switched it off. As the heater noise died away all he could hear was the sound of guns firing his way.
"As soon as I heard that I turned the heat back on and kept going," he says. "I didn't need to hear that gunfire."
In Korea, Parks' recon plane was sometimes accompanied by a fighter flown by Neil Armstrong, who later became the first man to walk on the moon. Parks and Armstrong went to Japan together three times, and Parks followed his former buddy's career with interest.
"When I saw him walk on the moon I was very proud," Parks says. "He was a good man, and I wasn't surprised he did so well."
While he was overseas, Parks' second son was born. Seven grandchildren and five great grandchildren followed.
After duty in Korea, Parks taught instrument flying in Texas. After a brief stop in California, he was sent to Georgia Tech to get a college education like most of the other pilots he flew with, many of whom were Naval Academy graduates.
While at Georgia Tech, Parks' life began to change. He and Elizabeth were active at First Baptist Church in Avondale Estates, and the more Parks talked to his pastor and fellow church members, the more he felt like he was being called to the ministry.
"I had always studied the Bible and tried to live a good Christian life," he says. "But I felt like I needed to do more."
Parks resigned his Navy commission and finished his Georgia Tech degree, then enrolled at the Southeastern Baptist Theological Seminary in Wake Forest, North Carolina. He was ordained a Baptist minister in February 1960 and accepted a call as pastor of the Bethsaida Baptist Church in Riverdale, Ga.
After stops at two South Carolina churches, Parks earned a Master's of Divinity degree and, in 1973, came to First Baptist Church of Newnan to serve as Assistant Pastor and Minister of Education.
"It was all as fulfilling as I had hoped," he says. "I knew I was doing what I was meant to."
In 1981 Parks was called as pastor of First Baptist Church in Hogansville and stayed until 1988, when he retired. For the first time.
After two years, Parks felt the urge to go back in the ministry. But this time he went back to his Methodist roots. Over the next 12 years he pastored four Methodist churches in the LaGrange District of the North Georgia United Methodist Church Conference. Parks finally retired for good in 2001.
"I had some frightening times in the military, and even after I entered the ministry, some of my church experiences were unpleasant," Parks says. "But I always knew where to turn when I had trouble. Some people wait until the last thing to turn to the Lord, but that's the first place you need to go. I knew that was the place that always furnished the answers."
Read article about Ralph Parks
Click on the name to read an article about Ralph Parks, my paternal grandfather.
retro photo
Left to right: Bill Bell, Ginger Bell, Kathleen Bell, Stephen Parks, Ralph Parks, David Parks, Elizabeth Parks.
Friday, August 01, 2008
dinsoars alive
William was taken to Madison Square Garden to see Dinosaurs alive:
I had a lovely evening with Andrew. He tried the bike, even though for a little. He's really getting into his trike. We kicked the ball around and hung out, had a nice evening of it. I felt less overwhelmed by just having him. I think we need to have these dates more often.
I had a lovely evening with Andrew. He tried the bike, even though for a little. He's really getting into his trike. We kicked the ball around and hung out, had a nice evening of it. I felt less overwhelmed by just having him. I think we need to have these dates more often.
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
Monday, July 28, 2008
back home
I got back today around the time I usually come home from work. It's a full house with Ashton, Aida, Natasia, AJ, Venus and Emma. The boys are very excited to see me. It's good to see them.
Friday, July 18, 2008
poopie in your face
I spent about 10 minutes saying, "no, poopie in your face," to Andrew over Skype. Zane joined us too, joining in. Diana didn't so much like poopie in her face, but she was busy with Ashton.
She told me William pooped in the pottie and earned his last Land Before Time movie. Now he's got the complete set. Now the reinforcement schedule will go to 5 "balloons" (since he didn't want stars) before he gets a present and go up 5 each cycle. Andrew still flounders learning to urinate in the potty, though I think concentrated attention will get that.
Diana was upset someone put on youtube that they thought William was too old to be in a diaper. Then someone else said it was OK because he is autistic. He's neither. He's OK. Relax people.
Reminds me of the time I was changing William in a public bathroom. A guy told me I shouldn't talk to William in baby talk. As if it's an either/or thing. You can do both people. Baby talk has been shown to be appropriate. Not sure where people get these ideas. But the capper was that he said he knew this because he talked to his dog in "real" words and it worked. Some people. I think children provoke a lot from people, we're all trying to figure life out. But come on. Support parents, don't criticize them.
I'm very sad at seeing Andrew sad that I'm not there. Diana says William asks if we're going to pick up daddy today. It's hard to be away from the boys. I feel selfish. But I know this is the right thing to do.
She told me William pooped in the pottie and earned his last Land Before Time movie. Now he's got the complete set. Now the reinforcement schedule will go to 5 "balloons" (since he didn't want stars) before he gets a present and go up 5 each cycle. Andrew still flounders learning to urinate in the potty, though I think concentrated attention will get that.
Diana was upset someone put on youtube that they thought William was too old to be in a diaper. Then someone else said it was OK because he is autistic. He's neither. He's OK. Relax people.
Reminds me of the time I was changing William in a public bathroom. A guy told me I shouldn't talk to William in baby talk. As if it's an either/or thing. You can do both people. Baby talk has been shown to be appropriate. Not sure where people get these ideas. But the capper was that he said he knew this because he talked to his dog in "real" words and it worked. Some people. I think children provoke a lot from people, we're all trying to figure life out. But come on. Support parents, don't criticize them.
I'm very sad at seeing Andrew sad that I'm not there. Diana says William asks if we're going to pick up daddy today. It's hard to be away from the boys. I feel selfish. But I know this is the right thing to do.
Thursday, July 17, 2008
Skype
I watched the boys for about an hour, while they ran around, jumped on Carmen when she came, jumped on Diana. I saw Ashton, and Victor came to pick him up. They got to see Grandpa Zane. I was more watching them, then them watching me smile or do silly stuff to the camera. It's pretty cool stuff. With the camera on Zane's computer and the one built into my laptop, we have a video phone call for free. It's really awesome. Megan and Gretchen supposedly can do it, so we're going to maybe check in on them sometime.
Andrew has been throwing up, but he seemed OK when I saw him. Diana has a cold but she's still watching her brother's children. William continues to struggle with #2 in the potty, but he's mastered #1, and he usually has a dry diaper in the morning--once they are used up, we're going to go without one.
William is going to summer school, and I like that. I think school should be year round, with big breaks. He had a 2 week break between sessions. Andrew starts in September, which will be here very fast.
Zane and Bridget are taking me out to lovely restaurants. I appreciate their kind hospitality.
Andrew has been throwing up, but he seemed OK when I saw him. Diana has a cold but she's still watching her brother's children. William continues to struggle with #2 in the potty, but he's mastered #1, and he usually has a dry diaper in the morning--once they are used up, we're going to go without one.
William is going to summer school, and I like that. I think school should be year round, with big breaks. He had a 2 week break between sessions. Andrew starts in September, which will be here very fast.
Zane and Bridget are taking me out to lovely restaurants. I appreciate their kind hospitality.
Sunday, July 13, 2008
shower
Eric and Luisa are having a baby. More cousins for William and Andrew. They are cousin rich. Claudia is in from Ecuador. Jessica is pregnant too, she's going to have a girl.
Here are the names left to right: Veronica, Alba, Jessica, Claudia, Luisa, Diana, Shirley, Alba, Aida.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Posts
