Internecine

Internecine is how William and Andrew relate to each other at times. They ventilate their anger towards mother or father or world (mother and father at this point), at each other at times to the mutual detriment of each other.

When we get home, there’s a period of feelings of overwhelmedness as anger, relief, excitement well up in them. At times that have tantrums about their unrealistic expectations of mother and father.

All children suffer from their expectations being crushed. Andrew wants daddy and mommy never to go to the bathroom, to close the door, to have needs beyond him. But he does recover quickly. He speaks up and has learned how to hit back. He makes people pay attention to him. He’s the younger brother and I think he’s overlooked sometimes because of his lack of language.

William has already developed an aggrieved distortion where he assumes he can’t get what he wants, before he’s denied it.

William takes a leadership role, but he’s not really nuanced enough to completely comprehend and doesn’t have all the tools of persuasion yet. He does nod his head “yes” which is a technique I read somewhere. The more you nod the more likely people will be in agreement, regardless of the content, but it’s not magic.

The boys can be doughty (\DOW-tee\, adjective, marked by fearless resolution; valiant; brave). I find myself promoting the “I think I can” attitude at time. I like the teaching aspect of parenting, though I get confused about what to teach beyond what is obvious to me in the moment, at times.