411. Happy

I woke up exhausted, even though I'd slept in to 6:40. Andrew woke up at 7, and went back to sleep and woke up again later. William and Diana were still sleeping and he kept going into the room to wake them up, so I took him for a walk outside. He was interested in a little boy behind us, so I stopped so he could look. The woman quizzed me about his age, and said her son was 9 months. She said he looked tired. When I came home, William wanted to go out. So I rested a little, and then took him out to the park. Aminta, Steven and his Abuela were there. Steven lent William some paper and pencil and made a plane, and chased him around. Aminta shared their water with William. Aminta thinks he said his name. William, despite our many efforts, does not say his name. While William was playing in the sand a fly bit him, and he was upset. So we headed out. He likes to swing by the corner where a bunch of cars are, so we went two blocks out of the way home. Walking home, he said, "pizza" and dragged me to the place that Cliff says has the worst pizza he ever tasted. It's so nice to have a friend who lives near by and likes to hang out with children, who is flexible and understands my circumstances. I'm greedy, I don't want him to move away, even though I'm sure he will. So we got a small pizza, and came home. Andrew was still asleep and we watched some of Charlotte's Web, with it's vegetarian subtext. I got to be rather drowsy after Andrew woke up, and Diana said, "go lay down." I slept for 3 hours and had a Buddhist retreat dream. When I came out, William was saying, "shoes," which means, lets put them on and go out. So we did. We went to the park again. He came to like a Jewish woman with 4 children, and followed her around. The ice creme trunk came, and William got a vanilla cone. I would occasionally lick up the melting part so it didn't drip so much, and wipe off his mouth. We played with the water fountains, and William walked across the ball fields. I half protect him and look out for flying balls, and half try to steer him away from danger. As I nudge him off the playing field he says, "hey," in an aggrieved tone. So we got some sesame noodles at King Wok, and came home the long way, exploring every nook and cranny to run his cars and trains along, he goes up the cement stairs that lead to nowhere and various excursions. When we got home, Andrew was glad to see me, and raises his arms and demands to be picked up. I watched Bill Moyers Faith and Reason, with Pema Chodron. I got some pictures of him standing next to her face on the TV. I'm not sure why I like taking photos of him next to the rupa or in this case Pema, but I do. I suppose it's the same reason my grandparents had a photo where William has his hands together in a kind of prayer. It's a kind of hopeful for shadowing. Buddhism works for me, but I hope to respect what my children decide is for them, what works best for them. I would like to expose them to some teachings, but in no way am I interested in brain washing them or indoctrinating them. I suppose my vision of the world guides me, and I can't but help to pass that along. William and Andrew took a bath, and William is all toweled off, and say, "happy."