420. Chop chop

Aida, the godmother, called Andrew, "An-drool". He's got his 4th tooth coming in. Aida taught William to say, "chop chop," meaning hurry up. He also says, "nope," instead of "no" sometimes.

They took the boys to the Putnum County Fair. Virginia drove, Aida and Diana. Robyn and Natasia joined them.

Over the weekend I came to the realization that William is not always guilty when Andrew is crying and Andrew can be demanding, a babyzilla at times, and William is just trying to defend his space.

Sunday they went to Chucky Cheese to celebrate Joseph's birthday. Diana reports that William was very good at sharing.

We got William to go to bed at 8, but he got up at 6:30, so I think the optimal amount of sleep for him is 10.5 hours.

I took William to the park on Monday. I feel the seasons changing, it's darker and it's getting cooler. It was hard to say goodbye for work Monday morning after 9 days with the boys. I felt refreshed at work. Spending time with the family is very important to me.

Saturday morning William said, "bus" in his sleep. I read in some weekly news magazine an article about dreams, and it asserted that children don't dream like adults until they are 7. I'm not sure if that's true. William seems to dream.

William also gets time out. He's learning the lessons no hitting, not pushing and no throwing (we'll work on the exceptions to that later).

Aida and Natasia slept over, and the boys slept till 9 and 9;30.Aida, the godmother, called Andrew, "An-drool". He's got his 4th tooth coming in. Aida taught William to say, "chop chop," meaning hurry up. He also says, "nope," instead of "no" sometimes.

They took the boys to the Putnum County Fair. Virginia drove, Aida and Diana. Robyn and Natasia joined them.

Over the weekend I came to the realization that William is not always guilty when Andrew is crying and Andrew can be demanding, a babyzilla at times, and William is just trying to defend his space.

Sunday they went to Chucky Cheese to celebrate Joseph's birthday. Diana reports that William was very good at sharing.

We got William to go to bed at 8, but he got up at 6:30, so I think the optimal amount of sleep for him is 10.5 hours.

I took William to the park on Monday. I feel the seasons changing, it's darker and it's getting cooler. It was hard to say goodbye for work Monday morning after 9 days with the boys. I felt refreshed at work. Spending time with the family is very important to me.

Saturday morning William said, "bus" in his sleep. I read in some weekly news magazine an article about dreams, and it asserted that children don't dream like adults until they are 7. I'm not sure if that's true. William seems to dream.

William also gets time out. He's learning the lessons no hitting, not pushing and no throwing (we'll work on the exceptions to that later).

Aida and Natasia slept over, and the boys slept till 9 and 9;30.

419. Mia

Mia came over for the first time with her mother. Mia is Daniella's daughter, one of our neighbors. She's Argentinean and her husband is Israeli. Mia turned 3 the other day, so she's got an 8 month lead on William. They played and fought. When Mia was upset she said, "I don't love you any more." William was just as hot and cold as she was, but they ended amicably, saying goodbye to each other. Mia was potty trained around 2 because her mother had floor that wasn't a carpet, and she just let her figure it out. She still has accidents though, and she's regressed some her mother reports because of the impending birth of David, who is due around Andrew's first birthday. I'd wanted to go to Harriman, but Diana wasn't into it, and after the visit they said it was too late. Diana, William, Andrew, Aida and Natasia went shopping and they didn't get home till late.

418. Bronx Zoo

Bronx Zoo is here.

The zoo was marvelous. I enjoyed the gorilla, the tigers, the nocturnal building, the whole thing. The children's zoo allowed you to pet and feed some of the animals. I think William enjoyed it.

417. Staten Island Children's Museum

We live in Kew Garden Hills. There's a museum in Staten Island for children. Here is our route.

Turns out the museum is part of the Snug Harbor Cultural Center. We had some difficulty locating the right place, but once we got close we could see some children's type play equipment.

The museum was good. There was walk in clay workshop, an insect exhibit, dog exhibit, a fire engine with little outfits you could put on, and an adventurer exhibit. We played outside in the boat park. It was a good day.

416. Flushing

I took William to the park, and then later to Flushing. We went to the library and got some DVDs and some books. DVDs: Winnie The Pooh, and DVDs of some of the books he has. Books: one on Charlie Parker, some Dr. Seus, and a subway mouse book, plus a baby faces book for Andrew. He was rambling around, I was trying to pick out books, and then I got a phone call from Diana and then a guard was telling me that I couldn't use the phone in the library. In the line to check out books and DVDs, I couldn't control William, and he was running all around. He met a little fellow who he began to run around with and they were OK until they went too far afield, and they almost went outside. The mother of the little boy shrieked and got her son, and William followed. When we left William said bye bye. Then we went for a walk around interesting Flushing. William got tired, we took the bus home, and he fell asleep in my arms, and I had to lug him home. He slept for a few hours, and I got to read. When Diana came home, with Andrew, I left for my Dharma group. Aida and Natasia came over.

415. Diana's day out

Diana left around 9:30 a.m. and came home around 8:30 p.m. It was an exciting day mostly alone with my boys. I have fear about being alone with them, there's nothing like the safety net of another person. It helps so you can do things, like blog. The boys loved my absolute attention, I didn't do anything for myself, except go to the bathroom, and eat. And I suppose I had a few private thoughts.

Instead of TV, I turned on Baroque music. Some professor at St. John's who come to my former school reported that Baroque music has a beat that is conducive to studying, but that the Mozart effect is bogus. Anyway, I didn't want TV and the music helps. In the end I turn on the TV out of exhaustion, but I resist it.

William played with lego, and the letter foam flooring Cliff and Vava got him. He plays with his cars and the straight race car track I got him. They wrestle a little bit. William can be a little rough, and I think Andrew will start to cry, but he laughs. That's the guide, the sounds of Andrew. I went into a kind of manic mode, and I was cleaning and organizing and doing the dishes. That kind of energy is not sustainable, but I'm doing it one day. I've recently been experimenting with leaving nothing in the tank, and seeing if I can function the next day. I usually can.

Shani came, she's the speech therapist. The took William into the room even though he didn't want to leave me. I had some good time with Andrew. I can see how this really helps the family.

Then after a while, William was begging me for a Thomas The Tank Engine DVD. I really like that show, it's pretty good, I think it inculcates good values. I like to figure out if I can identify the different engines. I find the language. "He caused confusion and delay," that being the worst that happens.

And one point, William said, "park". So I said, "when you clean up the lego." He cleaned for a second and then got distracted by the TV. Then he remembered, and cleaned up. He did a good job. So we went to the park, but not before we went to the post office and got some lovely books my mother sent for William and Andrew. At the park it was hard because I was more strict with William leaving the park. He likes to go where he wants to go, but with Andrew there, I need him to stay in the park. Andrew was having fun running in the big puddle, and even going into the fountain. William wanted me to get him the "juice" that another kid had, but I wouldn't. He hung out a little with a kind of family and even shared his Thomas The Tank Engine wooden toy, and he also has a Scooby Doo Mystery Machine van, matchbox car. These are his two constant companions. He wouldn't even put them down to climb. We got into the routine of putting the cars into the stroller so he can climb, but he's gone back to resisting that. I guess I need to get a little strict about that. William found a cute little curly haired girl who talked and made him laugh, and we went on the swings together. Then as soon as it happened, William walked away. He wanted to leave the park again, and cried on the cement. He was upset but I had 2 boys, and we needed to stay together. We went down onto the ball field. William wanted to go across it, and so I ran off and got the stroller quickly. Some muslim women went over when they were alone for a second, one picked up Andrew and handed him to me.

While we were waiting for Chinese food I went to the dollar store and got them some inexpensive trucks, and a tractor. It was hard to keep them quiet while we waited for the food upon our return, but we got out of there, back home, and ate some. Soon the boys were tired, and William fell asleep. Andrew had just fallen asleep when Diana came home. Whew! What a day.

414. Natasia is 9

Great Aunt Maggie passed away last Friday. She is grandma Parks' sister. My father, Zane, was very much attached to her, as well as my grandmother. William and Andrew never got to meet her, but I did, and I thought she was lovely. She had a straight talking way about her, she called a spade a spade. She wasn't stuffy or had pretense, she had what I call a cut through the nonsense kind of attitude that I find quite refreshing. She had a certain kind of clarity which is all too rare.

Last night we had Natasia's birthday party. This early August event is the highlight of our summer, with the collection of family and friends to celebrate this most precious birth. Natasia is a bright, beautiful wonderful 9 year old girl. She helps us out a lot. We have a special connection with her because when Harry left Aida, she moved in with us, and we lived with her for a while. I learned many important lessons about children from Natasia that helps me with my own two precious sons. And I am still learning.

Diana cried because I got William and myself a buzz cut, a very short, close to the head hair cut. They will grow back soon, but the short hair really upsets her. Vava pointed out that I have a short memory, I should have anticipated this, but it's not that easy for me. I got William a hair cut that wasn't a buzz cut, and she was equally upset. I'm not sure what kind of hair cut she expects. She was even more mad that I got a short hair cut.

The party was well attended, and Will and Drew fell asleep right as they were cutting the cake. They woke up during the hullaballoo of the two pinata. Daniella and her daughter Mia were there. Her son David is in her belly and should be coming out within a month. She's a full of life woman from Argentina, and her husband is Israeli. Cliff and Vava came. They said when they handed Natasia her present she mechanically went to the window and added it to the pile of presents she had. Josephine, Michael, Evan and Ava came. I mispronounce Ava's name, I pronounced it /Aiva/. Vava pointed out my mistake, Josephine and Michael thought I was doing it on purpose, so they never corrected me. Tim came late because of work. Bill came late. The party was supposed to start at 1, but it didn't really start until 4. It was nice to see Robyn, Evelyn, and David and Jessica. Much of Aida's family was there, those strong boys. The boys woke up, and I took William home, as I was exhausted.

In the morning before the party, I took William to get my car from Vajramati, whom I lent it to. The car had developed problems, and I barely got it home, it was quite tense, mostly because I didn't want to be on the side of the road with William. It needs a new water pump and some hoses, an oil change, and hopefully not more work, we'll find out today.

413. Mets

I took Diana, William, Andrew, Natasia, Cliff and Vava to the Mets game last night, with the home. This was William's second game, and he seemed to take more and more in. This was Andrew's first game. He was attracted by the lights, the noise, and his insatiable desire to move. This was Natasia's second game, I thought I heard her say. She seemed to have fun. This was Cliff's second game, first of adulthood. He joked it was his patriotic duty. He focused on the hotdogs and beer, which he greatly enjoyed. I enjoyed seeing Piazza, the great Mets catcher, hit two home runs, and yet the Mets still winning. The first homer was an opposite field shot. One shot was to the warning track, but our hundred million dollar man tracked it down. Cliff was amazed at the salaries the players make. I showed my kids off to some in the home and helped out a little bit. I gave someone their glasses they forgot. I hope everyone had a good time, I know I did. I got some good pictures I'll be sharing on snapfish with those I usually share it with. Cliff suggested I get photos for my blog, but I don't know when I'll have time to figure that out. Maybe on my week off. I have off from Friday at 5 p.m. August 11th, to Monday morning at 9a.m. August 21st. I'm looking forward to that!

412. Will and Bart Visit

Bart and Will came over last night. We had some Chinese food and talked. Will had a kind of sumer internship in Alaska doing archaeological stuff. Bart was scooping ice creme until he got an internship at some agency that hooks the elderly up with home help. They seemed well. They go off for their second year of college soon.

Then we entered the fray of 7 children (Andrew, William, Emma, Mateo, Jaquan, AJ, Venus). I wasn't awake when Aida and Natasia came, that takes us up to 8 children. The other day Alex called, and laughingly said, "how do you like 8 children in your house?" Of course I'm overwhelmed. I go to bed early. But I also think Andrew and William are enriched by being with others. As I am. We put in a Backyardigans CD and some of the kids danced. I'm greatful Will and Bart treked all the way out here. It means a lot to me.

And then the next day, when the neighbor brought over Junior, there were 9! Diana sure likes children.

411. Happy

I woke up exhausted, even though I'd slept in to 6:40. Andrew woke up at 7, and went back to sleep and woke up again later. William and Diana were still sleeping and he kept going into the room to wake them up, so I took him for a walk outside. He was interested in a little boy behind us, so I stopped so he could look. The woman quizzed me about his age, and said her son was 9 months. She said he looked tired. When I came home, William wanted to go out. So I rested a little, and then took him out to the park. Aminta, Steven and his Abuela were there. Steven lent William some paper and pencil and made a plane, and chased him around. Aminta shared their water with William. Aminta thinks he said his name. William, despite our many efforts, does not say his name. While William was playing in the sand a fly bit him, and he was upset. So we headed out. He likes to swing by the corner where a bunch of cars are, so we went two blocks out of the way home. Walking home, he said, "pizza" and dragged me to the place that Cliff says has the worst pizza he ever tasted. It's so nice to have a friend who lives near by and likes to hang out with children, who is flexible and understands my circumstances. I'm greedy, I don't want him to move away, even though I'm sure he will. So we got a small pizza, and came home. Andrew was still asleep and we watched some of Charlotte's Web, with it's vegetarian subtext. I got to be rather drowsy after Andrew woke up, and Diana said, "go lay down." I slept for 3 hours and had a Buddhist retreat dream. When I came out, William was saying, "shoes," which means, lets put them on and go out. So we did. We went to the park again. He came to like a Jewish woman with 4 children, and followed her around. The ice creme trunk came, and William got a vanilla cone. I would occasionally lick up the melting part so it didn't drip so much, and wipe off his mouth. We played with the water fountains, and William walked across the ball fields. I half protect him and look out for flying balls, and half try to steer him away from danger. As I nudge him off the playing field he says, "hey," in an aggrieved tone. So we got some sesame noodles at King Wok, and came home the long way, exploring every nook and cranny to run his cars and trains along, he goes up the cement stairs that lead to nowhere and various excursions. When we got home, Andrew was glad to see me, and raises his arms and demands to be picked up. I watched Bill Moyers Faith and Reason, with Pema Chodron. I got some pictures of him standing next to her face on the TV. I'm not sure why I like taking photos of him next to the rupa or in this case Pema, but I do. I suppose it's the same reason my grandparents had a photo where William has his hands together in a kind of prayer. It's a kind of hopeful for shadowing. Buddhism works for me, but I hope to respect what my children decide is for them, what works best for them. I would like to expose them to some teachings, but in no way am I interested in brain washing them or indoctrinating them. I suppose my vision of the world guides me, and I can't but help to pass that along. William and Andrew took a bath, and William is all toweled off, and say, "happy."

410. A night out

Diana and I celebrated our 9th wedding anniversary with the help of Virginia who came over and watched our precious boys. We had a lovely dinner, and went to a movie, my second at the movie theaters since William was born. I think my first since Andrew was born. It's so good to be with my wife, alone. It was a precious evening.

The boys had not napped before we left, so they went for a walk and fell asleep. I called while we were about to watch the movie. But when we got home their bedroom light was on, so that meant they were both up.

William likes to go to bed when I do now, or at least try and if he doesn't fall asleep fast, then he just goes out into the living room with Diana. Soon we're going to begin to try and shape a sleeping patter that will be complementary to Diana going back to work soon. She's already getting anxious about it.

Friday we met Cliff and Vava at the Vleigh Park. They are very kind to hang out with us. We got some Chinese food, and came home. The boys fell asleep and we watched what turned out to be a very interesting movie for me, K-Pac.

Today is AJ's birthday party, it might even be his birthday. Happy Birthday AJ. William often says, apropos of nothing, "AJ and Emma."

Friday morning William woke up early. Thursday morning Andrew woke up early. It's like they're taking turns. I feel their need for me, their desire to be around me, and I am greatly touched by it. I must be there for them.

409. Diana's Day Care

The boys are growing up fast. If you cling to it, it slips from your grasp, for they are constantly changing. Grunty got an upper tooth. He and Joyti run around, chasing each other, and laugh and laugh. They wrestle with each other, and you have to be careful so that William doesn't crush Shantikara, the peace maker. Andrew come to the bed now and raises his harms and grunts so that I pick him up. He loved my bed table, and likes to mess it up, grab the lamp. William has come to be manipulative and willful. He will eat crap all evening if we let him. He will watch his DVDs all day if we let him. Diana baby sit two of Aida's nephews, and yesterday Diana baby sat one of the neighbor children. It's a regular child care center here. I went to bed early Tuesday night because the virus that began with Diana and went through the family hit me. I'm on the rebound, though the nose can be snot filled at times, and everyone still is prone to coughing fits. Diana didn't charge Aida's sister. I'm not sure she'll charge the neighbor. Turns out we're going to Harry and Angie's wedding, they invited all of us, William and Andrew included, so we're going. Lots of silly family politics and whatnot. I hope we're in harmony now.

408. Colds

William and Andrew have a cold, Diana seems to have come down with something too. She started it. I'm sure I'll be getting it too, and then we're going to be in trouble.

The boys are OK though. William whispers to me, and then when I say, "are you telling me a secret?" he says, "Secret" in a whisper.

Andrew has graduated from drunken sailor walking, to tipsy sailor.

Sunday we went to the doctor, it's the first time I've seen their second doctor. He seemed a little brusk to me, but Diana said not more than the lesser of the two he used to see. The strep culture was negative, they have something viral, which I think means it's just a cold.

Cliff met us at the park, and we hung out some. He came over, and we played some chess while the boys were sleeping, 10 minute games. Then we watched Open Water, which is a scary movie. I took William to the park later, for the second time. He played some where he says, "come on," and I follow him around. He met a cute little girl, and they played a little. Then we went to the field, the ball park and grass. He played with the water fountain and got a little wet. He played with the rocks.

William dances to the TV sometimes. He really likes the Backyardigans. It's a lovely weekend with the boys, I missed being away from them, and it's hard to enjoy them when I'm tired during the work week. They've been a little clingy with their colds.

407. Back home

William and Andrew (the three guys, Natasia and Robyn) and Diana and Aida all went on a long bus ride to the Bronx Zoo today. They got there late, so they didn't do a whole lot, but they got to see baboon, monkey, Ibex and an ostrich.

Yesterday was the aquarium. William liked the jelly fish and clownfish and Andrew was scared of the shark.

It was so wonderful to see my boys when I got back from Aryaloka. I had a wonderful retreat, but really wanted to be reunited with my boys. They seem to have grown. William is talking more, Andrew is walking better. Andrew was not as ecstatic, I don't think he's as attached to me as yet. Happy 10 months to Andrew, and happy birthday to Diana. We went over to Diana's sister Virginia's house Sunday to celebrate, and a wonderful time was had by all.

406. Going Away

There has been so much going on. Work is so intense. That I am going away for a week, family has been intense. And the spiritual life has been intense too. So I've let the blog slide for the first time in a long time. I want to write once before I go away. I'm going to miss William and Andrew and Diana, so much, while I am on my retreat. Diana think it's crazy to go away, but it helps me to love them all, to be the best me possible for them.

Andrew is so cute, he howls till I pick him up, when I come home. William and I have a special connection as well. William is using more and more words, it's hard to keep track of. He's repeating words. I just love it when I lay on the floor and they climb all over me, I love swinging William around. Andrew does not yet feel comfortable with that. William is going on the swings more and more, which he avoided. I fear Andrew will have some of the vestibular sensory integration issues as William. I try to be mindful of when he's uncomfortable, and not push him into an uncomfortable mode.

I love William, Andrew, and Diana.

405. Eleven children

I'm writing this entry for the 3rd time, because on Aida's computer and another the pop up blocker blocked my spell check and I lost the text. So I'll just quickly say that there were 11 children over at "Camp Miller" as Diana likes to say, over in New Jersey. William said "bridge" when he saw it in a book, which made me proud, and then he later fell asleep with out a bottle.

404. Gum

They went to bed early for 3 days in a row. But I took William for a bike ride, and he fell asleep a couple blocks into it, so he took a nap. He probably won't be going to bed at 9 tonight.

Andrew's doctor appointment went well. He got 3 shots. He's not even gained a pound, only 12 ounces (21 lbs 13 oz.), almost one, but he's grown an inch in length (height) 28.5 inches and in circumference of his head, 47 1/4.

I went to a toy store and got William a big ball to help with some OT exorcises. I got him some hotwheel track, and a baseball glove and ball, and some beach toys. Diana got the glove and said, "this is what I thought you'd get when we found out I was pregnant!"

Diana said, "what's this in your mouth?" It turned out to be gum in Andrew's mouth. Yikes.

403. Bugs

William fell asleep Monday night, when I drove Aida and Natasia home. He got a good 12 hours sleep. With 6 kids around, Andrew had to be more vocal to get his needs me, but he was more vocal.

When I got home Tuesday night, they were both asleep. It made me sad. Good news--Cliff and Vava are moving two blocks away from us! How amazing can that be?! And he moves in Wednesday!

Andrew prefers regular food to baby food. William really likes to be outside. He says, "bugs," quite a lot.

402. Smack

William said, "Grandma" to Abuela. I want him to speak Spanish. I went over to Virginia and Tim's Saturday morning, so Diana could do her project for her class. She's not going to be taking classes until September, so life is going to get easier till then. It was the first night Diana didn't sleep with us, since we've been 4. William slept from 10-7.

The Irish couple I met Sunday at Virginia's party for the Ecuador v. England in the World Cup, had Holly a 3.8 year old, and Joshua, an 8 month old. They were impressed with Andrew's walking. Holly took a liking to William and they played all day. William fell asleep later, and I went and packed up to come home, and she slapped him awake. She apologized, and kissed to make up, and William planted a kiss smack on her lips, turning his head at the last minute. Cheeky little guy.

401. Twelve Steps

Diana has two more weekends of class, so this father's day, was another tough solo day. I gave the boys a bath, fed them, took them to the park, and then I was pretty much done. I hold off playing a DVD for a as long as I can. Virginia came over, and then went out for lunch, and came back. I didn't feel like going out for a meal. Last meal we went out was with Rich and I spent the whole time chasing William or trying to comfort Andrew.

The following are words William said Sunday: no, eggs, juice, triange, off, up, down, help, chalk, tooth brush, tooth paste, bath, door, push, bug and opse, plus the letters A and J, the names Andrew, baby, Emma, AJ, Vava and a Spanish word, "mas".

William nodded off coming back from the park, but woke up when here. While I was trying to put him down, unsuccessfully, William insisted on milk for himself. His bottle had enough, but he likes to add some more milk for some reason.

Diana called me at work Monday. Andrew took 6 steps. I came home later, and I counted out 12 steps that he took. Amazing.