So I got home around 5:15 pm yesterday. I'd not seen the boys for about 8 days. I thought a lot about them on the retreat. Hugging them felt so sweet. They were excited and I think some anger was that I left was mixed in a little there. I think they're good at living in the moment, so they don't hold grudges.
Andres seems as though he's talking a whole lot more and asks about words and tries out words a lot. Before I left, I played with him kicking the ball at me a lot. He really liked that and worked up a sweat. He's right footed, he's reluctant to kick with his left foot, which I challenge him to do in a friendly way occasionally. It was a nice connection with him. When Paquita came, when it was time for me to leave, his quality of crying indicated he realized I was going away. Or maybe he was just enjoying our morning together.
William seems so grown up. He's been asking me to play "once upon a time". I play with Thomas and create a story. At some point, he takes over and I watch him tell the story. I tell stories about things I imagine are going on with him starting school, and I name some of the trains the names of his peers at school.
This morning Diana and I were trying to talk, but the boys kept interrupting us. I was insistent on us talking and the boys actually played for a while with minimal support. Andres has the harder time, and they do get into squabbles.
They got really dirty at the park today. There's a quality of play that is familiar to me. They were playing in the fountain and with dirt.
Coming home I realize what a lot of responsibility I have, to have a family, to work so hard, to work to engage in a real and active spiritual life. Life is very rich. Too much at times, just right others.
Here's a quote from a book I read on retreat:
From p. 78 of What Makes You Not A Buddhist by Dzongsar Jamyang Khyentse:
"When some of us become parents ourselves, even a little understanding of interdependence effectively softens our expectations of our children, which they may interpret as love. Without that understanding, we might have good intentions to love and care for our children, but our expectations and demands can become unbearable."
Sunday, September 30, 2007
Happy Birthday Andres
We're having a big party next weekend at Virginia's out in New Jersey. Zane is flying in from California. But on his actual birthday, there was a little party with what turned out to be lots of kids.
Flying Andres
Venus helps Andres to Fly. Emma is in the background. This photo was taken on his actual birthday.
Saturday, September 29, 2007
Monday, September 17, 2007
a decent proprosal
I read on Bodhi's blog about an article in the New York Times that calls for restricting children's toy advertizing. Sounds like a decent proposal to me.
Sunday, September 16, 2007
Apple Picking
So we went to New Jersey on Saturday and hung out in a nice suburban house in that direction. William enjoyed Evan and Ava's Thomas The Tank Engine toys so much, he didn't want to come home.
Sunday we went to see Frankie and went apple picking. The boys ate so many apples it was worth it. For me it was a bit of a long drive. I should go to bed instead of write this blog.
So we enjoyed being out doors in yards in suburbia. Makes me want to get the boys an abode that has a yard. I don't think they're suffering now. I am a little bit though.
I'm starting to feel guilty about being away for so long starting Friday.
Sunday we went to see Frankie and went apple picking. The boys ate so many apples it was worth it. For me it was a bit of a long drive. I should go to bed instead of write this blog.
So we enjoyed being out doors in yards in suburbia. Makes me want to get the boys an abode that has a yard. I don't think they're suffering now. I am a little bit though.
I'm starting to feel guilty about being away for so long starting Friday.
Hector & Evylyn Kiss at Wedding
Aida and Natasia watched the boys so we could go to Hector and Evylyn's wedding.
Thursday, September 13, 2007
Presents
Aunt Di sent the boys cute letters: An A for Andrew and a W for William. She also sent a kind of beach ball that is a globe. Thank you Aunt Di.
Grandma Kathy sent William and Andrew some tracks, and trains (notably the Chinese Dragon train, some new freight cars and new Thomases (William likes fresh eyebrows, and Andrew got one he can say is his, without fighting William). There's the water filler, and there's a watch tower with a bridge. The boys absolutely loved it. The boys absolutely loved the present.
Grandma Kathy sent William and Andrew some tracks, and trains (notably the Chinese Dragon train, some new freight cars and new Thomases (William likes fresh eyebrows, and Andrew got one he can say is his, without fighting William). There's the water filler, and there's a watch tower with a bridge. The boys absolutely loved it. The boys absolutely loved the present.
Monday, September 10, 2007
Sunday, September 09, 2007
Saturday, September 08, 2007
Diana bought
Diana bought a some presents for William. She got him some tracks and 2 trains. Here's the video of them opening up the bag and being excited.
Friday, September 07, 2007
expressive dance
William tripped 2 times on his walk to school today. I talk to his teacher, she speaks in safe generalizations, but says he's doing well, and made him say a good goodbye to me.
William is ready for school
Everyone is so proud. Diana went the first day, and we brought along Andrew and Paquita. William was surprised that daddy or mommy wouldn't stay with him the whole day. But he was fine the second day. He's really into school, and why not? You get to play! I tell him he has to listen to the teacher, follow directions, and get along with his classmates. He's kind of strutting around, proud of himself, and excited for this rite of passage--going to school. Diana cried some. I feel excited for him and anxious about him getting a good start. His teacher seems nice.
Outside
Mommy has packed his lunch, with many goodies. He's got a notebook for comments from the teacher. He has supplies--extra clothes. And of course he carries some trains. He wouldn't let me carry it, even though it's heavy.
Headed to school
William is really excited to be going to school. We've all so excited. He asked me if he could walk to school himself!!!! Diana says never. I asked him if he knew how to cross a street yet.
Wednesday, September 05, 2007
First Day of School
William began preschool today. He's going from 8:30-1:30 at a school called Stepping Stone. It's across from the pizza store that we always get pizza from, near Vliegh Park. It's a short walk. I'm going to be taking him to school, but Today Diana, Andrew and Paquita joined us. Andrew seemed to want to join in, it broke my heart to hold him back. The teacher seems nice. There are assistants. William said, "are you going to stay at school with me?!" I wish I could have. He realized that mom and dad couldn't stay with him, and he got sad. But the teacher supported him and the idea of getting out his Thomas brightened him up. I look forward to tomorrow taking him by myself. I look forward to hearing how his day went. It's a big day for the family.
Monday, September 03, 2007
Saturday, September 01, 2007
Update
The boys are cute. It’s the end of the summer and change is in the air. The boys really hated me going to work when Mom wasn’t home with them. Diana went back to work Thursday. Andres wants to put his shoes on with me, and go to work. William threw tantrums about someone playing with the trains in the way he did not designate. For instance I put the express coaches on Neville and he gets upset. He runs into his room.
Andrew can climb up the jungle gym, William goes down the big twirling slide by himself. A woman commented that William is sweet. I swell with pride. I think they’re pretty special. Andres tries to be helpful even if he isn’t so much at the moment, giving me things I don’t need. He kissed the little 4 month old twins the boys were playing with. A focus of mine is being friendly, relating positively to others, protecting yourself when kids are mean or not open to socializing. They play with many different races, Chinese, Indian (Gujarati speaking), Hispanic, Jewish (Askenazi & Sefardic), and Eastern European (Romanian, Russian) kids. Not too many WASPs. I like the diversity, but I wonder what would happen if there was a more common cultural base. It is the world they inhabit. I was talking with Trebor last night about my struggles, fears and joys of being a father. He’s got a baby on the way—a girl due in October. Virginia is due around the new year. A woman at work is in between those two, I think.
Andrew can climb up the jungle gym, William goes down the big twirling slide by himself. A woman commented that William is sweet. I swell with pride. I think they’re pretty special. Andres tries to be helpful even if he isn’t so much at the moment, giving me things I don’t need. He kissed the little 4 month old twins the boys were playing with. A focus of mine is being friendly, relating positively to others, protecting yourself when kids are mean or not open to socializing. They play with many different races, Chinese, Indian (Gujarati speaking), Hispanic, Jewish (Askenazi & Sefardic), and Eastern European (Romanian, Russian) kids. Not too many WASPs. I like the diversity, but I wonder what would happen if there was a more common cultural base. It is the world they inhabit. I was talking with Trebor last night about my struggles, fears and joys of being a father. He’s got a baby on the way—a girl due in October. Virginia is due around the new year. A woman at work is in between those two, I think.
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